Why Does Christmas Last So Long?

Why in the hell does Christmas seem to start before Thanksgiving and end at New Years? It's one day, and oh by the way, it's meant to celebrate the birth of Christ (not that I'm Christian or anything). But yet, I see decorations everywhere—almost none of which relate to Christ. I hear Christmas Music. People are in the holiday spirit. Not to mention the Christmas specials on TV and the Salvation Army ringing the bell outside the large stores and shopping centers.

Perhaps the thing that irritates me the most is Christmas Music. Mostly because I hear it everywhere I go. Good thing I work at home most of the time and don't turn on commercial radio or TV that often.

What gets me through the holidays is demented Christmas songs. Such classics as:

  • Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer by Elmo and Patsy
  • Christmas at Ground Zero by Weird Al Yankovic
  • Christmas Dragnet by Stan Freberg

I know there are others, but I can't think of them because I should be asleep.

What I think I also need to hear is someone like George Carlin rip apart Christmas like he did The Ten Commandments.